Pens

Have you every chewed on the end of a pen for so long that the pen errupts in you mouth?

Ink don't taste too good.

No, this wasn't my first time.

A little late -- 60 to 45

I don't know when it started but one of my defecencies in life is returning rental movies on time.

I'm always late. And with all the late fees I've racked up, I could have bought all of the movies I have rented.

With that said, last saturday I bit the bullet and paid my late charges at blockbusters. My late charges steam prior to blockbuster launching their "no more late charges" policy. Sucky for me.

When I went up to the counter, I informed the girl behind the register that I owed some money and to not hollar out the amount I owe.

She smiled, then proceeded to discount my bill.

So, in appreciation, I say thank you, "J".

Ramon

Fortunate Son

I like this song -- no, it is not my way to protest the war, I just like the song.

Some folks are born made to wave the flag,
Ooh, they’re red, white and blue.
And when the band plays hail to the chief,
Ooh, they point the cannon at you, lord,

It ain’t me, it ain’t me, I ain’t no senator’s son, son.
It ain’t me, it ain’t me; I ain’t no fortunate one, no,

Yeah!
Some folks are born silver spoon in hand,
Lord, don’t they help themselves, oh.
But when the taxman comes to the door,
Lord, the house looks like a rummage sale, yes,

It ain’t me, it ain’t me, I ain’t no millionaire’s son, no.
It ain’t me, it ain’t me; I ain’t no fortunate one, no.

Some folks inherit star spangled eyes,
Ooh, they send you down to war, lord,
And when you ask them, how much should we give?
Ooh, they only answer more! more! more! yoh,

It ain’t me, it ain’t me, I ain’t no military son, son.
It ain’t me, it ain’t me; I ain’t no fortunate one, one.

It ain’t me, it ain’t me, I ain’t no fortunate one, no no no,
It ain’t me, it ain’t me, I ain’t no fortunate son, no no no,

Today is my Birhtday

Happy Birthday, me.

I'm 29 today.

A Weighty Truth

In my pursuit to lose weight, I'm sad to report that I actually gained 4 pounds.

My co-workers subtly shunned me. I could see it in their faces.

I am sadden.

The truth is I have not been diligent with my plan. In regards to food, its been a 90% effort. The occasional late night snacking mixed with eatting massive amounts of carbs this weekend did not help cause at today's weigh-in.

On the exercise front, I'm wracked with disappoint--I am not doing what I said I was going to do. The idea of working out each night has transpired to only three times over the last two weeks.

There's my confession. Now the changing of the mind must succeed.

Meal schedule

I figure it would be a good idea to write down or at least try to keep track of what I eat each day.

so, here it goes ...

Thursday -- 01/13/05
* breakfast - 2 quesidillas on low carb tortilla (8 g / carbs)
* snack - diet coke and powerbar, carb select(2 g / carbs)
* lunch - 1/2 and order of fingers with ranch (2 g / carbs)
* snack - 1/2 and order of fingers with ranch(2 g / carbs)
* dinner - 1.5 servings of low carb spaghetti, salad (10 g / carbs)
* snack - powerbar, carb select (2 g / carbs)

total carbs: 26 g / carbs

Note: I forgot what I ate on wednesday, so I can't post it.

Tuesday -- 01/11/05
* breakfast - 1 ham and egg burrito on low carb tortilla (5 g / carbs)
* snack - Chicharrones [prok rins] (1 g / carbs)
* lunch - 1 ham and egg burrito on low carb tortilla & low-card yogurt (8 g / carbs)
* snack - powerbar, carb select (2 g / carbs)
* dinner -5 chicken thighs, one low carb tortilla and cheese( 5g / carbs)
* snack - 2 cups of half/half with splashes of corn flakes(25 g/ carbs)

total carbs: 46 g / carbs

Note: Too many carbs this day. I had been miscalculated the half/half with splashes of corn flashes -- I'm giving them up.

Monday -- 01/10/05
* breakfast - powerbar, carb select (2 g / carbs)
* snack - half of a low carb chocholate bar (1.5 g / carbs)
* lunch - (3) .99 cent caesar salads frim wendy's (6 g / carbs)
* snack - other half of low carb choch. bar and a powerbar, cab select (3.5 g / carbs)
* dinner - 2 steak, cheese burritos on low carb tortillas (12 g / carbs)
* snack - cup of half/half with some reg. milj with a splash of corn flakes (14g / carbs)

total carbs: 39 g / carbs

Note: I've recalculated my first count of carbs...I was wrong about the half/half with flakes.

Weigh-in

Today 10 of us at VEGAS.com have weighed in, placed our money on the table and got up on the scale.

We have banded together to lose weight and hopefully for the biggest loser make a few bucks.

Yes, the idea partly comes from the TV show "The Biggest Loser", but our main inspiration is health...and the money ain't bad either. Ten people at $100 is 10 benjamins. And we know its all about the benjamins, right?

Yesterday while at Costco on some obscure isle, I weighed myself. Right before getting on the scale I instructed Maryann not to look. She didn't, which I am glad for. The scale broke my heart. But on the flip side, at least I didn't break the scale.

According to yesterday's weigh in I am pushing 242 pounds. But at today's weigh in, using two different scales, I registered at 233. I'm somewhat happy that both scales said 233 cause that means I don't weigh 242.

Nonetheless, I have 40 pounds to lose in 3 months. I know that sounds a little extreme, but in high school I did loose 50 pounds in three months. And over 11 years gained it all back plus some.

I want to loose 40 pounds not so much for the money, rather for the health aspect. If I loose 40 pounds and don't win the money that is okay because that means one of my other co-workers lost more than I did.

The way the contest works is based off the percentage of weight you loose. For example, If I weigh 233 and loose 40 pounds, that's 17 percent of my body weight. Not bad.

Now the wild card in this contest is if our largest co-worker looses 76.5 pounds. With that, he ties my percentage. All he needs to do then is loose 77.5 pounds and he beats me.

There are few others who are +/- 10 pounds of where I am at. They will be good competitors and may even surpass me which is cool.

Come Sunday, April 10, 2005, I hope to be 40 pounds lighter or near that.

My strategy

A realistic workout plan: situps and girlie pushups along with an evening brisk walk.

My eating workout: 5 or 6 meals a day, low carb.

Suggestions

If you have any suggestions or concerns, feel free to post 'em. If you want to invite me to go work out, please do. But one favor I do ask, please do not invite to a buffet.

Here's to weight loss and a healthy life.

Peace!

I need a haircut -- the big afro guys is me

Movements Part II

The paperwork has been sign, so it must be official.

Starting Jan 17, 2005, I begin working reduced hours in an effort to pursue a Master's Degree in Management Information Systems (MIS).

My first day of class is January 19. In order to apply for grad school I need to retake two courses that I got bad grades in. And in March, I will hopefully take my GMAT.

I am super excited about this move. Its a win-win situation for my employers and me.

Its a huge, bold move for me and has come via many awesome things coming together.

Father, brothers and sisters are the biggest influencers in making it happen.

I am happy.

Movements Part I ...

Dearest Kate,

It is true that your love is sweeter than ice cream

You make me feel wonderfully neat

Your love is completing...I need to understand that

I want you to know how much I love you

May my actions and deeds speak these words to you...I love you

It has really hit me: I need you, I love you and I want you

I would be be so sad if our journey were to cease

May our paths be together as we sojourn in this land

Then in a glimpse may we find ourselves together in our true completing land

Love,
Jack

To Cedar, Duck Creek and back

I am sure glad to be home.

I know two things for sure: I don't like snowed in cabins and I don't want to go back in the winter time.

The only slightly fun place I have ever been in Utah has been in Park City. Every other place has been very, very boring.

Making my way to Duck Creek I found out that the 14 (its and interstate/highway) was closed due to snow. So, I was stuck in St. George for a night. After securing a room at the Best Western I went to dinner and then went to see Ocean's 12.

The movie sucked, I feel a sleep. There weren't many people in the theater so I sat way in the back. I must have been snoring Real Hard cause the girls 6 rows in front of me moved even further away from me while I was catching some shut-eye.

These girls seemed to be a little perturbed at my snoring. I felt bad that I was snoring but I didn't think it was that bad. But it must have been, cause as I walked to my car one of the girls was giving me a George W scowl.

I am sure glad to be home.

Did I mention I hate the snow?

Michelle and Darren -

you both make me laugh.

:-)

In mormon country

In mormon country

Its funny how many eyes stare at me because of the color of my skin.
If I was white, I wouldn't have this issue.

And why do they stare at me? Don't they know that I am unredeemable-the curse of cain thing will do that to you.

Currently stuck in st. George ... I'll write more when the snow clears in cedar.

Peace!
--------------------------
Ramon Avendano
via BlueBerry

Since my last blog ...

1. courtesy VEGAS.com, I got three free nights at Golden Nugget in downtown

2. stayed one night at the GN with maryann and my mom (she was our chaperone)

3. flew to El Paso, TX and back in a 24-hour period for a Quinceniera.

4. while in El Paso, my mom, maryann and her sister (emily) enjoyed a girls night out at the GN [emily is now hooked on nickel slots courtesy of my mom].

5. came back from El Paso and went straight to the GN.

6. started my two week vacation (I am now on my 4th day).

7. my sister and 5 nieces and nephews came into town for a visit.

8. I have been to the mall only once, but stayed there for 5 hours ... blah!

9. went to Fantastic indoor flee market (my sister's idea).

10. went christmas shopping at Best Buy and frys (I should have bought Napoleon Dynomite at Frys when I had the chance).

11. saw a movie -- the incredibles -- much better than I expected. [side note: why do they make cartoon women look hot?].

12. rented the movie Collateral four days ago but just watched it last night.

13. I've had some necessary but good, healing time in prayer, reading, confession and learning to hold on to truth.

In honor of DR -- One of my favorites

There's somethin' happenin' here.
What it is ain't exactly clear.
There's a man with a gun over there
A-tellin' me I've got to beware.

I think it's time we stop.
Children, what's that sound?
Everybody look what's goin' down.

There's battle lines bein' drawn.
Nobody's right if everybody's wrong.
Young people speakin' their minds
A-gettin' so much resistance from behind.

I think it's time we stop.
Hey, what's that sound?
Everybody look what's goin' down.

What a field day for the heat.
A thousand people in the street
Singin' songs and a-carryin' signs
Mostly sayin' hooray for our side.

It's time we stop.
Hey, what's that sound?
Everybody look what's goin' down.

Paranoia strikes deep.
Into your life it will creep.
It starts when you're always afraid.
Step out of line, the men come and take you away.

You better stop.
Hey, what's that sound?
Everybody look what's goin'..
You better stop.
Hey, what's that sound?
Everybody look what's goin'..
You better stop.
Now, what's that sound?
Everybody look what's goin'..
You better stop.
Children, what's that sound?
Everybody look what's goin

Upon further review

An ode to the Relyea's family member

You are round
You are brown

You snort
You fart
You smell

You breath heavy
You have bad breathe

You are a dominatrix
You are sensitive to the touch

You have no one to blame but yourself

You have comsumed too many nibbles and bits

You fat chihuhua ... it is all your fault

Lay off them damn treats!

"Tina, you fat lard... you haven't done anything all day."

Movements

I've been having movements lately. Pushing forward and doing my best to leave certain things behind.

I'm planing to keep pressing forward in faith that it is the right thing to do.

More is to come ...

That day

The day my father died I took my car for its smog test.

Not a usual thing to do, eh? I mean, doesn't it seem odd that the day my father dies, I go out and get my car smogged?

That day has been seared into my brain. My father's death was burdening and liberating, but no less painful.

I'm thankful I smogged my car that day, it spoke of my freedom.

I'm sorrowful that I smogged my car that day, it cost my father his life.

My friend, Greg went with me to smog my car that day.

I don't remember all of our concersation, but I remember being with him.
I remember feeling both of our awkwardness.
I remember feeling his love.
I remember feeling his compassion.
I remember feeling his pain for me.
I remember feeling his friendship.

I speak to all of you who read this. Please, identify those people in your life who are in need. Those people who are in greater need than you are today. Give those people the freedom to do what they are called to do.

Liberate those people who need to get their cars smogged.
Liberate those people who need to walk their dogs.
Liberate those people who need to make a meal.
Liberate those people who need to do what it is they need to do.

Greg, thank you.

Love, Ramon

Its been a while

I have so much to say.

Right now I am listening to Boston (More than a feeling) on luanch cast.

I need to Apologize to my freind Debbie. She emailed me last week and I haven't emailed her back. Debbie, I'm sorry.

It has not been my intention to igonore my friends or my blog, but work has been bruttal. There was a two week period where my boss was out (his wife has his baby). While he was at home acclamating to Daddy life, we (kelly 'my co-worker and friend' and me) were holding down the fort. We worked 10, 11, 12, 13 hour days. Lots of fun, lots of headaches. Overall, it was good and very hard.

Tonight, we are still at work. Its another late night. That sucks.

* Went to the doctors two weeks ago. I had been having these weird pains in my chest, stomach, side and my back (on the left side). I thought of all the possibilities of what it could have been: heart attack, cancer, fungus, whatever else came to mind.

The doc believes it is my gall bladder. I'm still waiting to have my ultra sound. Doc's office and insurance suck.

* This past weekend was hard...it was my 10 year high school reunion. Maryann and I enjoyed oursleves. I'm very sad that I won't see these people for a long time. Believe it or not, I really miss these people and quazi community I had with them. I pray for them. I miss them. I am sad.

* in 4 days it will be my father's 4 month anniversary of being dead/alive. On his 3 month anniversary, I bought 2 cigars, and two bottles of water. I sat with my dad at his gravesite and smoked the cigars and shared my bottles of water with him. I smoked both cigars and talked with my dad. I miss him. I feel all the more sad when I remember him in his illness. Thinking of him in his illness leaves me feeling empty. The emptiness hurts. When I think of my father being in heaven, I don't feel as sad.

When my father was sick, he used to lay on the couch. He couldn't do anything else. Would it have killed me to not have gone to work any one of those days? I miss him. I cry.

It is true that I did alot for him and for my mother and for myself. But in all that, it wasn't enough. Gosh, I wan't to spend more time with him. It's so not fair.

I need to go sit with him again and talk and smoke. Maybe we both need a drink. Well, at least I know I do for sure. I really doubt he does.

Darren

I went out of town this Labor Day weekend. And while I was gone, Darren visited with my mother.

He didn't ask me if it was okay, he didn't announce it to me, he just went and hung with her. He was her friend. And brining nibbles (his over-weight, extremely large Chihuahua) helped spark some conversation, I'm sure :-)

Thanks, Darren.

Love,

Ramon